There are two major causes of wedding planning stress.
One. A wedding is an emotional event, as it should be. You are moving into a brand new phase of your life, so don’t underestimate the affect planning your wedding will have on you.
Two. Wedding planning is a series of business deals. This fact is often forgotten in the joy of anticipating the wedding day.
Emotion and the art of making business deals is a tough mix! Your emotional self and rational business-minded self are not always going to see eye to eye as you plan your own wedding – often emotion wins out.
Wedding marketers count on this fact and are very savvy at appealing to your emotions to get you to open up your wallet.
At some point the conflict between your emotional desires and your rational mind will cause you wedding planning stress. The answer is to strike a balance – if only your rational mind is getting its way, and emotion is shut out, you won’t be happy.
One solution is to give your emotional side an offering now and then as you make your wedding plans.
Have you heard that little voice inside you yet, the one that says, “…But I want it!” in spite of the fact you can’t afford it? If not, it’s likely that you will at some point in the wedding planning process.
Never just say “No” to that voice and then go off and sulk – offer it a deal.
For example, you fall in love with a big jazz band, but the cost is way outside your wedding budget.
Before declaring the band too expensive and drowning your disappointment in a bowl of triple fudge ice cream, or spending the next 5 years wishing you’d saved up for the jazz band, figure out what you might be willing to cut back on or eliminate from your wedding budget to afford the band.
Are you willing to serve chicken at your wedding reception instead of crab cakes? Cut the open bar and serve just beer and wine? Nix the floral centerpieces?
Now you may decide that you’re not willing to make the necessary sacrifices for that jazz band so you go with the DJ anyway.
That’s okay; in fact it’s so much better than just outright denying yourself the band.
By going through the steps to see what you’ll have to lose in order to afford the band, you’ve either discovered that you actually can afford it, or that you’re not willing to cut other items from your wedding budget.
Either way, you have peace of mind, and that’s very important. This exercise is key for keeping your wedding planning regrets to a minimum.
Don’t underestimate the learning curve!
Your wedding will likely be the most complicated event you will ever plan. Even a small, casual wedding has a lot of moving parts.
You may have training and experience in your chosen profession and even your hobbies, but event planning is probably new to you – don’t go into this process with the expectation that you should just “know” how to do it.
Understanding what’s at the root of your stress as you plan your own wedding — and how to diffuse it — is one of the biggest secrets to planning a successful wedding.